In light of the approaching Valentine’s Day, Dr. Goh showed us a film about romance. However, instead of the usual love story about the process of courtship, this film is mainly about what happens after the tying of the knot.
Forget Paris (1995) Trailer
Forget Paris (1995) was very entertaining. I loved the way the story was narrated by a group of friends (this made the film even more fun to watch!). Most importantly, the way the film portrayed the conflicts faced by the couple was very realistic. I’m sure that most, if not all, couples could relate to this. Overall an excellent movie for me and I would recommend this to everyone, regardless of whether you are married or not.
What I’m more interested in blogging about is the discussion which we had with Dr. Goh after watching the movie.
One interesting thing which we discussed in class was the impact of romance movies on audience’s (especially couples) expectation of relationships. Well, the first observation which I made concerns one’s physical appearances. No main character (as a couple) is ugly in most, if not all, movies. Even in the movie, She’s Out of My League (2010), the guy ended up with an attractive and beautiful girl. Perhaps I haven’t watched enough movies, but name me one movie whereby both the characters are ugly (not counting Shrek) and love each other because of their personality (even Quasimodo had a pretty girlfriend in The Hunchback of Notre Dame II ).
And this is why everyone is looking for someone attractive even though they think they themselves are ugly. Don’t get me wrong, there nothing wrong with a person wanting to have an attractive mate. But there is something really wrong if a person needs/must have an attractive girlfriend/boyfriend.
What they’re showing you in movies are IDEALS, not necessary rooted in reality. So enjoy the shows but remember to come back out to reality.
In the above point, we discussed that many think that the challenge is finding the right person, however, the REAL challenge is maintaining the relationship after you find the right person.
Most romance films portray the relationship to be smooth sailing (except for the initial drama, misunderstandings etc) and that relationships (including marriages) can break so easily, just because “I don’t love you anymore” or “I don’t think we’re meant for each other”. The focus is pretty much on yourself.
Many couples break up for the smallest of conflicts. Dr. Goh sees conflict as opportunities to strengthen the relationship, and I totally agree with him! Unfortunately, many do not seem to realize this…
Another movie which I’ve watched with deals with the problems of marriage is Fireproof (2008). Fireproof looks into how a husband struggles to save a marriage using only 40 days with the help of instructions from the Love Dare! What I found more meaningful in this film is the fact that God is in control of everything. If you’ve watched Forget Paris, and liked it…you should definitely watch Fireproof because you won’t regret it!!
Fireproof (2008) Trailer